Training and Mental Health: My Honest Story

Why I'm writing this

I'm John, a personal trainer in Clapham. Before I was a trainer, I was 120kg and avoiding every camera because I was ashamed of myself.

This isn't a guide full of science. It's what happened to me, what I learned, and what I'd say to anyone who recognises themselves in it.

Where I was

I was a manager at a leisure centre, and I didn't enjoy the job. The hours were long and the environment was stressful. It's an odd thing to say about someone working in a place built for health, but I wasn't looking after mine.

I often finished at 11pm. By then I was tired and stressed, and the only thing open was a takeaway. So late-night takeaways became a habit, and the weight crept on.

Eventually I was 120kg and avoiding every camera because I was ashamed of myself. Even walking up the stairs to the gym when I was closing the leisure centre was tough.

When you're in that state, you adjust to it. It becomes your "normal". You tell yourself it's fine not to go to the gym, that you're too busy, that your health can wait because work matters more.

It took me five years to realise it wasn't the life I wanted. Five years of poor health, blood pressure through the roof, and quietly wasting my life.

What changed

Then covid happened. Time off work and not seeing anyone made me look at my situation. I realised I needed to change everything: my diet, my fitness and my health.

I bought a few weights for the garden, set daily step goals and got a Myzone belt to track my workouts. Over the next few months I lost 20kg of body fat and felt the best I'd felt in ten years. That was my experience, and everyone's is different.

That change is why I became a coach.

Why Sundays are the hardest

Here's something I don't hear people talk about. For me, Sunday is the hardest day of the week, because it's the day I don't train.

Training gave my days structure. When that structure goes, my head fills the gap. If you get the Sunday feeling, you're not strange and you're not weak. Routines matter, and Sundays often don't have one.

My Sunday tips

• Go for a walk. Daylight, fresh air, no phone. Even 20 minutes changes how the rest of the day feels.
• Plan Sunday on Saturday. An empty day is harder than a planned one. Decide what you're doing before you get there.
• Keep busy with small things. Cook something, tidy one room, see someone, go somewhere. It doesn't need to be big.
• Get Monday ready. Lay out your clothes, plan your meals (my meal prep guide helps), sort one job. It takes the edge off the evening.
• Have one thing to look forward to. A film, a meal, a call with a friend.
• Talk to someone. A message to a friend counts.

If you want a personal trainer, here's what to look for

I'm not going to pretend I'm the right trainer for everyone. Whoever you choose, look for:

• No stupid diets. If they want you eating nothing but chicken and broccoli, or promise fast results, walk away.
• Someone who takes things slowly. A trainer who knows what they're doing builds you up gradually and doesn't smash you in the first session.
• Someone who asks about you first. Your history, injuries, sleep, stress and goals, before they pick up a weight.
• Qualifications and insurance. You're allowed to ask.
• A trial before you commit. You should know how it feels before you pay anything.

If you'd rather start with a gym, visit at the time of day you'd actually train. Ask about busy hours, and pick somewhere you'd be happy to walk into on a bad day.

If you'd like to try a session

My studio is on Northcote Road, five minutes from Clapham Junction station. It's quiet and there are no walk-ins, which is how I keep it personal. You only ever see me and the clients booked in, so there's no one watching you.

Every new client gets a free 1-to-1 trial session, with no commitment. Book your free trial.

You're not the only one

Even a heavyweight champion of the world finds Sundays hard. Tyson Fury has spoken publicly about it, saying he feels "absolutely suicidal every single Sunday" whether he's in training camp or at home (source: Planet Sport).

If that sounds like you, please talk to someone.